On July 3, 1996, my husband received an anonymous phone call. The news shocked us beyond belief: Our 16-year-old daughter, Janelle, gave birth to a 9-lb. baby boy five days earlier. How did our daughter, who lived under the same roof with us, conceal her pregnancy for all those months?

Her father and I knew, subconsciously, but we went into denial. We also knew that Janelle was strong-willed and had a mind of her own. As soon as she found out she was pregnant, she decided to have the baby and give him up for adoption. When Jordan was born, she changed her mind.

Janelle wanted me to take Jordan into our home and raise him for her. Since she was busy with friends, working, and going to school full-time, I'd be Jordan's primary caretaker.

My own children were almost grown, and I wasn't prepared to accept the responsibility of raising another child. Jordan's father was unreachable at the time his son was born, so I was hard-pressed to come up with a solution.

I was stressed out because I didn't know what to do about the situation. We had no friends or relatives who could help with child care. Janelle placed Jordan with foster parents who cared for him temporarily, but they pressured Janelle into letting them adopt him.

Several adoption agencies called and wanted Janelle to give up her son. Janelle was adamant; she refused to relinquish him.

I finally calmed down enough to meditate. I asked for guidance, and the message came to me: Go to the Internet. I logged on to the Web and did a search in Deja News for newsgroups.

I found one called alt.adoption and posted a plea for help and sent it out into cyberspace. I received over 80 e-mail messages -- mostly from angry contributors to the newsgroup who felt I should take Jordan into my home and raise him as my own.

I had just about given up all hope of support when I received an e-mail from a woman I 'll call Barb, who was from one of the Mountain States. She and her husband, Jack (also not his real name), empathized with my family's dilemma.

They offered to take both Janelle and Jordan into their home and live with them until my daughter could decide what she wanted to do. Perfect strangers reached out on the Internet and offered to help. I intuitively knew they were good people.

After many e-mails and phone calls, Barb flew to California to accompany Janelle and Jordan back to Barb 's home. Janelle decided at the last minute that she couldn't leave her family or friends, so we let Barb take 3-week-old Jordan alone on the plane with her.

The airport good-bye was gut-wrenching, but I knew in my heart that it was the right thing to do. A few days later, Janelle flew to Barb's home state, signed guardianship papers, and returned home to her job and education.

Barb and 6-month-old Jordan visited us at Christmas and stayed for a week. We discussed open adoption. Barb had been adopted when she was a young girl, and kept in touch with her birth parents throughout her childhood and adult life.

She and Jack wanted to give Jordan the same opportunity: They offered to become his adoptive parents, and Janelle, Jordan's father, and both sets of grandparents could have contact with Jordan at any time. The solution sounded ideal to me, but Janelle wasn't ready to give up her parental rights.

After Christmas, Barb, Jack and Jordan moved to the Southeast, where Barb's birth and adoptive family lived. Jordan's father, Victor, decided he wanted custody of Jordan. The guardians had to give Jordan up even though they were attached to him, and Jordan had bonded with them.

Janelle flew back to the Southeast and picked Jordan up. I was out of town for a week so they stayed at our house. Janelle and Victor made arrangements for Jordan's care.

I agreed to let Jordan stay with us on weekends because Janelle was free of work and school obligations. When I held my 10-month-old baby grandson in my arms, he cuddled close. That was enough for me: I'd have no problem being the loving, doting grandmother.

Janelle knew nothing of this development and became upset when Barb took Jordan back to her home without Janelle's consent. Janelle decided she wanted custody of Jordan.

I realized Janelle had to do what she felt right, but she'd have to figure out a way to move out and raise Jordan herself. She had to accept full responsibility for the choices she made. I was torn. I wanted to be a part of Jordan's life, but I wanted what was best for him, too.

On December 11, 1998, after a two-year legal battle that involved Janelle, the guardians, Victor, and his parents, Janelle finally signed papers allowing Barb and Jack to become Jordan's adoptive parents.

I don't think Janelle realizes yet that she made the right decision for her son. It will take some time for the wounds to heal, but Jordan is happy and well-adjusted. We all keep in touch via e-mail, and visits are in the planning stage. Barb frequently sends us pictures of a beaming Jordan.

If it weren't for the Internet, Barb and Jack would have never come into our lives. I believe they were meant to be Jordan's adoptive parents, and they had the insight to realize that open adoption was in my grandson's best interests.

Jordan is a lucky little boy because he has so many people who love and care for him -- his adoptive parents and grandparents, as well as his birth parents and grandparents.

We're all working together now to be there for Jordan, and I have the Internet to thank for his guaranteed security and happiness.